Not to start the New Year off on a downer, but I just read the first blog post I made in 2011 and realized how poorly I did at meeting the goals I set for myself 12 months ago. Someone once said that New Year Resolutions were just a “to-do” list for the first week of January. I’m not sure I even made it a whole week on some of these goals.

I didn’t lose 50 pounds—I did lose ten pounds, a couple of times, but found them again the moment I fell off the dieting wagon. I did not start any new book manuscripts, nor did I follow a successful writer friend’s advice and directly contact the editors of a couple of national magazines and convince them to publish my work.

I meant to do that one. I really did.

I didn’t work on my sons’ scrapbooks at least once a month. Actually, I don’t think I even glanced at the darn things all year long. For the past few years, the only scrapbooking I’ve done happens on a few frantic evenings in late December, when I rush to create photo calendars for the grandmothers and aunts in the family.

My eldest son, Zach, will be 14 in a few weeks. I am still scrapbooking his kindergarten Christmas play, if that gives you any indication of how far behind I am on that project.

I did not plan monthly menus and stick to them while grocery shopping, nor did I fully master couponing. My bank account wishes that I had. But I didn’t.

And forget that comment about embracing the FlyLady.net’s cleaning routines to get my house in order. If anything, it is even more chaotic than it was a year ago, and being disorganized is biting me now in the most painful way.

However, not everything was a totally epic failure. I’d say my spiritual life is about as healthy as it was this time last year, neither greatly improving as I’d hoped, but not deteriorating, either.

I didn’t keep any weight off, but I exercised more than I have before, and had a better attitude about fitness in general. While exercise didn’t become a routine part of every day, we joined a pool over the summer and will likely do that again. So my commitment to exercise more often was at least partially fulfilled.

I don’t know if I was a more patient teacher with my kids during our homeschooling time—I guess you’d have to ask them that question. I’d like to think I’m continually improving in this regard, but I am not convinced that I’m where I need to be yet. I won’t be happy until my patience level falls somewhere between Mother Teresa and June Cleaver.

Speaking of the Cleavers, I can say that I kept my commitment to make my husband a higher priority, and I hope that he noticed. I think he did. I know that I feel closer to him than I did a year ago, and I hope that he feels the same way, too.

I am not giving up on my poor house, either. Before I sat down to write this, I worked on a new daily schedule and created a weekly checklist for our FlyLady chores. Doing so actually sparked the idea for this column. So I’m hopeful that 2012 will bring improvement in that regard.

Of course, I’m always hopeful in January—and I refuse to believe that past failures have to influence what I choose to accomplish this year. Actually, I find that’s the real value in creating New Year Resolutions—the power is not so much in defining the goals, but in looking back a year later and examining yourself to see how well you met them, or attempted to, and how life has or hasn’t improved because of your actions.

I don’t need a new list of resolutions—every item on last year’s list is still worth pursuing and fulfilling. It might take a few years to meet all these goals, but that’s OK—it’s my list. I’ll accomplish it in my time.

I have a relative who travels a lot and often brings me shampoos and soaps from the hotels at which she stays. She is very persnickety about what she chooses — no cheap-o Dial soap here. She’s graced me with lots of lovely little bottles from Bath and Body Works and Crabtree and Evelyn. One of my favorite scents is this:

Crabtree and Evelyn’s Citron, Honey and Coriander. Yum, yum and YUM! I have the shampoo, conditioner and tiny bar soap. I use them on those nights when I want a little extra “somethin’-somethin’” in the shower, a break from my usual Dove products. But, sadly, the little bottles are only good for two showers at the most. And I want to enjoy that fragrance longer.

But check it out: on the C&E website, a bottle of hand soap in this fragrance is $22.00 before shipping!

Yeah, I love it, but I don’t love it enough to pay THAT much for one lil’ ol’ bottle of hand soap.

SO, brilliant domestic goddess that I am, I had an idea: how about refilling a foam hand soap dispenser with a trial-size shampoo bottle and fill the rest of it up with water?

It works, and how well it does! It leaves my hands so soft, and with that beautiful, lingering fragrance.

And it’s free. Did I mention the free part?

Remember this when you get down to that last bit of shampoo in the bottle. Just add about 7 ounces of water to each ounce of shampoo and voila — instant foam hand soap for pennies!

You’re welcome.

Note: I apologize for neglecting my blog for a week! I guess I got too caught up in all the Turkey Day preparations and that, coupled with a few writing assignments, left me little time for blogging. Here is my column that was published on Thanksgiving Eve. I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving Day!  Ours was great—I even got to enjoy the parade with my cuppa joe.

Military strategists could learn a thing or two from watching a mother organize a big Thanksgiving dinner. It seems simple enough—after all, it’s just cooking, right? Paula Deen and friends on the Food Network make it look deceptively easy as they prepare a giant spread in just 30 minutes. When I was a kid, my grandmother Honey made it all seem so effortless that I truly believed it was.

Then I grew up and the torch was passed to me. And now, every holiday, I’m in charge of hosting the big family meal. I don’t mind admitting that it usually wears me out. Sometimes I wonder how Honey always seemed so happy on Thanksgiving now that I realize how hard she worked. She’d appear at the table with her makeup and jewelry on, looking so pretty and put-together, you’d never know that she’d been slaving over the stove for days.

And I haven’t even touched on the cleaning.

I’ve been watching that new TLC show, “Sister Wives” with a sort of doubtful curiosity. It’s about a Utah man with four wives and a gob of children. One of the wives is totally devoted to housekeeping and cooking. Now, I’m not saying that polygamy is OK, but I’m envious of the other three wives having someone to take care of the domestic stuff. If I had a sister wife, maybe I could show up at the Thanksgiving table looking more like June Cleaver and less like a sweaty old ox who’s plowed a few too many fields.

When I shared that thought with my husband, Donnie just mumbled, “Yeah—another wife. That’s exactly what I need….” I didn’t know whether to laugh or to smack him. I’d only want a sister wife for the holidays, though. Then she’d have to go.

So without another woman to carry the burden, the holiday meal planning has kept me hopping this week. The easiest part has been the turkey. My mom ordered a smoked bird from Shane’s Rib Shack and Donnie will pick it up today. I’m sure it’s going to be delicious. But I have never found store-bought side dishes that come anything close to the family recipes we’ve enjoyed for generations.

Honey taught me that a feast comes together only after dozens of carefully planned technical maneuvers over the days preceding the holiday. So I hard-boiled my eggs on Monday and will devil them today. I baked the cornbread and biscuits for my homemade dressing, and cooked the sweet potatoes on Tuesday; both will be finished tomorrow. I also made the cranberry sauce yesterday, and wrapped up most of the cleaning. The pies and casseroles will be assembled today and baked tomorrow.

It’s a true labor of love, all those hours chopping, stirring and sweating in the kitchen.

My husband Donnie is rather in awe of the process, as he gets overwhelmed if he has to boil pasta and heat spaghetti sauce simultaneously. But having a house full of hungry, appreciative boys makes cooking at the holidays fun. They all love to eat and it’s a pleasure to watch them enjoy the fruits of my labor.

I just hope they honor me back with an hour or so off in the morning, so I can snuggle under a blanket with a cup of pumpkin spice coffee and enjoy the Macy’s parade. I look forward to that as much as any other Thanksgiving tradition.

Perhaps my grandmother was so happy on Thanksgiving because she was born during the Great Depression and raised her children through WWII. That dear lady knew what it was like to do without, and she never took abundance for granted. Sometimes I think that those of us who came after her don’t comprehend how good we have it.

I’m going to miss Honey terribly tomorrow, when we sit down to the first Thanksgiving meal we’ve ever had without her. But I’m going to remember what she always said mattered most—that her family was together, sharing a good meal and spending time with people we love. May your Thanksgiving Day be full of the same simple blessings.

2. My sweet memories of my grandmother, Honey: is what’s been on my mind on and off all day.

3. Remember when $10 was enough to fill up a totally empty gas tank?

4. Zach, Eli and Jonah are three of my favorite obsessions

5. During the last year my faith in God and man has been tested.

6. Finding a good deal puts a smile on my face.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to relaxing at home with my wonderful family, tomorrow my plans include housecleaning and writing, and Sunday, I want to do more of the same!

Friday Fill-ins may be found here.

Camping is SO totally NOT on my summer to-do list, nor shall it ever be. And no, this is not an early Top Ten Tuesday post…it’s Sunday’s Covington News column!

Finally, school is out for summer! But whoever called these the “Lazy Days of Summer” didn’t take a peek at my to-do list.

As you probably already know, we’re a homeschooling family. That means that we have the freedom to take breaks throughout the year as we see fit. We could take our longest annual break in fall or winter if we wanted to.

If it were up to me, that’s exactly what we would do. I am not a fan of summer’s heat and humidity, so I’d much rather have a big chunk of time off when the weather is cooler.

However, my sons prefer to keep their schedules similar to their friends who attend traditional schools. It does make sense that they get to spend more time with their friends this way. So for the next eight weeks, we are on summer break, too.

I love how the term “summer break” conjures up long, lazy days, sipping a cold drink by the pool. But for the most part, this summer will be a busy one. Not only do I have a newly mobile infant to keep me on my toes, I have eight-zillion-and-one things to accomplish around this house. And since I just walk around in circles without a list to guide me, I made Kari’s Top Ten List of Things to Do This Summer.

1. Remodel both bathrooms. We are finally going to fix these blasted bathrooms we’ve lived with for over three years. The tile is atrocious, the floors are bowing, and the fixtures are original from the 1960s. We haven’t been able to use the shower in the master bath for years because it leaks underneath the house. There was no easy way to fix it—everything has to be gutted. I am truly thrilled about this. But please remind me how happy I was today when I’m complaining about the dust and chaos of living with a big remodeling project.

2. Paint the dining room and the kitchen cabinets. It’s a goal that depends largely on the hubby’s cooperation, and since he’s the one renovating the bathrooms, this is probably pushing it. But I still hope that by September, I’m enjoying a green dining room and bright white kitchen cabinets.

3. Declutter the entire house. Baby Jonah is eight months old, but I am still catching up on the backlog that didn’t get dealt with during my pregnancy. In this small house stuffed with messy males, it only takes a few weeks of inattention for the clutter to pile up. So, you can imagine the impact eight months of bedrest had on my home.

4. Sort through all our homeschooling resources and get organized for next school year. I am such a geek—this is pure fun for me!

5. Use the grill more often. Not only is barbecued food delicious, but it allows me to delegate a big chunk of the cooking to the hubs.

6. Read more and watch less TV—not just me, but the entire family.

7. Make time for my girlfriends every week. Unless you have also spent the past 36 weeks teaching a 6th grader and 2nd grader separate lessons while simultaneously juggling a cranky baby, you can’t imagine how much I need some time away from my responsibilities. Look out, girls—I’m coming out to play this summer!

8. Let the boys play with water guns, sprinklers and water balloons more often. The fun is worth the mess. Repeat that with me: “The fun is worth the mess.” That shall be my summertime mantra.

9. Add another week or two to the end of our summer vacation, just because we can. This is one of the most decadently delicious aspects of homeschooling, when we’re still playing in August while all our schooled friends are back at their desks.

10. Relax. Ironically, this seems the most daunting item on my list. But I’m determined to make the time to kick back beside that pool with my icy cold drink, relax and enjoy my life. Because this summer of 2010 is a precious gift that will never come again.

Oh, and by the way, Borax in the dishwasher didn’t work at all! Praise the Lord that my mom is at the grocery store now and she’s picking up some detergent!

___________________________________________

Tonight’s list isn’t that easy to compose. I am super-tired, Zachary is sick, and it was an otherwise pretty uneventful day. But I find that those are the times, when nothing extraordinary has taken place, when it’s best to reflect on the good things in life.

1. My coffee this morning. I don’t know why it tasted extra-good, but it did. That usually only happens when my husband makes the coffee. Maybe his gift for making the java is rubbing off on me?

2. Working with Eli on his math. Now that is a miracle, because I hate math. I try not to let that show when I’m working with the kids, but math is the bane of my existence. Anyway, I tried a few fun teaching ideas with him yesterday, and he retained it all! And we actually had fun again today. With math! Amazing.

3. Finding an ample supply of peach baby food at Kroger tonight. My baby Georgia boy loves him some peaches, but for some reason, the past two times I grocery shopped, they were sold out.

4. It was sunny, but cool enough to open up the windows and let the fresh air in. What a gorgeous day!

5. Running the attic fan. What a blessing that artifact is! I don’t know if they even make them anymore, but I grew up in a house with an attic fan and I just love having one again. It’s like a huge vacuum, that sucks all the hot stuffy air out of the house and draws in the cool, fresh air from outside. LOVE it.

6. Finding directions for substitute dishwasher detergent online when I discovered we were out of Electrasol, and I’d forgotten to buy more tonight. It’s 1 TBSP of baking soda or washing soda, and 1 TBSP of borax. If it works well, that might be my new frugal/green substitute for the chemical stuff.

7. Shining my sink after loading the dishes. Zach and Eli usually do the dishes these days, but since Zach is sick, I gave them the night off. Zach never scrubs my sink after he’s done (I guess I need to teach him that next). It was nice to do the dishes and have a sparkly sink, all at once!

8. Watching Jonah enjoy his first-ever Ritz cracker. I was concerned that he might choke, but he sucked on it very carefully and really enjoyed slurping off little soggy bites.

9. Getting a kiss on the cheek and a hug from my sweet 8 year old, Eli.

10. Enjoying the silence in my house right now, as everyone sleeps but me. A delicious, almost too-cool breeze wafts in through the window beside me, and I hear the pine trees stirring and the crickets chirping softly. It’s so peaceful at night, a solitude that is calming and refreshing at the same time.

For more Top Ten Tuesday posts, visit Amanda.

Sometimes I wonder what we did with our free time before this baby arrived. There are never, ever enough hours in the day anymore, and oddly enough, sometimes I feel that most on the weekends when Donnie is home.

We’re still trying to dig out from under the accumulated mess of basically a whole year of Mama not doing what she usually does around here. I found out I was pregnant in late January, and shortly after was on limited activity due to morning sickness and to help prevent another miscarriage. I had a few weeks in the early second trimester where I had no limitations, but soon began having preterm labor symptoms that kept me laying low for the remainder of the pregnancy.

I’ve written about the issues I had after the c-section, and it definitely took longer to recover physically after a surgical birth. And now—though I am NOT complaining because I’m super-happy that Jonah is breastfeeding better—I spend much of the day sitting and nursing him. He doesn’t like the swing, or the sling, or the bouncy seat for more than five minutes at a time. So somebody is holding him most of the day, and he even sleeps with us at night.

Don’t get me wrong. I love the cuddle-time. It passes so quickly. Soon we’ll begin transitioning him to his crib, and before I know it, he’ll be crawling and exploring and will be too busy to be held for long.

Anyway. Saturdays. I mentally compose this overly-optimistic to-do list all week long, of all the things we’re going to accomplish the next weekend. And then when it arrives, we get maybe 10% done. If we’re lucky.

Today, we need to: put the Halloween decorations away, put out a few of my Thanksgiving things, clean/declutter the bar and kitchen counters (it slays me how fast the paper clutter piles up on those areas!), clean the bathrooms, do laundry, empty, scrub and refill the litter boxes, plan menus for the next two weeks—including Thanksgiving, make a grocery list and do the shopping, sweep and vacuum, have the boys clean their room, and it would be wonderful if Donnie would spend at least an hour tackling the insane amount of stuff that has built up on our carport.

So why am I wasting time sitting here, blogging? Well…I had to sit somewhere while eating breakfast. Jonah is napping on Daddy’s chest while he and the boys watch a recorded episode of “Ben 10″, so I can actually type two-handed at the moment. But I just finished the last sip of coffee, so I better log off and get busy before my cutie wakes up for another feeding.

My mother-in-law is flying in for a visit later this week. Gosh-darn-it, for once, I am unable to do much of the cleaning required to get the house guest-ready. Bummer, that.

One of the tasks that is way overdue is to clean the hall bathtub—and the wretched glass doors that enclose it. In my opinion, glass shower enclosures are made by Satan himself, shipped right up to us all sparkly and shiny so that we’ll be tempted to buy them. But like all of Beelzebub’s tricks, what is shiny and pretty soon becomes dingy and mildewy and you’re a slave to it before you know it.

Anyway, since vigorous shower-scrubbing is not on my “allowed” list of activities as prescribed by my obstetrician, I told Hubby how I’ve always cleaned the shower. I use an economical, mild combination of Borax powder and dish soap (cuts soap scum like a charm!), applied with a brush and lots of elbow grease, followed by a rinse and a generous spraying of a bleach-and-water mix.

Poor guy. He thought he could just spray it with bleach and water, and voila! All would be clean. Kinda hated to burst his “easy way out” bubble.

But then in typical male fashion, he ignored my suggestion and decided to handle it as most men do: by utilizing as many power tools as possible.

He took the doors off the tracks and carried them outside. Then he washed them with the pressure washer attached to the garden hose. I don’t know what he used for soap—I didn’t want to ask. Then he uninstalled the track and carried it outside to clean in the same fashion.

I think he might’ve removed the bathtub itself if he’d had enough caulk to reinstall it.

Which is fine. Hey, if lugging heavy breakable objects through the house and down the back stairs makes you happy, go for it. But then I discovered the downside to his method as I nearly slipped on the wet kitchen floor. Carrying all the dripping wet parts back through the house left a long trail of water and wet footprints. It extended all the way from the laundry room, through the kitchen, through the dining room, down the hall and into the bathroom; thus creating another chore: Mopping.

Which sadly enough, is also not on the list of things I’m permitted to do.

Bless him.

I bought it a week ago, when I bent my obstetrician’s modified bed rest rules long enough to slip away on a rogue journey through Target. But that little box somehow managed to disappear after I brought the bag into the house. Unfortunately, that’s happening with greater frequency around here as I’m forced to delegate more tasks to other family members.

If you’ve ever had to color your own hair—and I say “had to” because who wouldn’t rather pay someone to do the honors if you could afford it?—you understand why it’s crucial that I find that box of L’oreal today. The instructions say to wash your hair 24 hours before you dye it, so if I don’t color today, I have to wait another day. And since aging, salt-and-pepper roots don’t really “go” with the youthfulness of a big, pregnant belly, I want to get the job done before seeing some old friends tomorrow.

By the way, please don’t email me to say that you think it’s awful for an expectant mom to expose her fetus to chemicals for vanity’s sake. I’ve researched it and the risk of harm is virtually non-existent. It’s a mental health issue for me: if mama ain’t pretty, mama ain’t happy. And if mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.

Ever since having a preterm labor scare a few weeks ago, I’ve been ordered to take it easy. That means no shopping, cleaning, lifting, or exercise. All that relaxing sounds nice, doesn’t it?

I can live without the exercise part—how many times in life does a couch potato like me get a free pass from forced movement? But as the days tick by, the novelty of resting wears thin, and the more disorganized my house becomes. And let me tell you, it wasn’t all that organized to start with.

My husband’s a great guy, but Mr. Mom he’s not. Like most men, he just doesn’t notice things that need to be done around the house. For him, the shower doesn’t scream “Clean me!” until the mildew is thick as a rainforest, and the floors never need mopping until they’re sticky enough to peel a layer of skin off the soles of his feet. In his opinion, cereal is a perfectly acceptable dinner for the children, and there’s no point in catching up on laundry until everyone is out of underwear—including the pair with the holes and weak elastic stashed back in case of emergency.

And it’s a fine line when it comes to asking him to do more housework, because I still haven’t deciphered the formula to communicate these things to him without sounding like a nag. After 18 years of understanding our respective places in the family, it’s a huge struggle to readjust and let go of control.

To make matters worse, my mother-in-law is flying in to visit this week. Thankfully, she’s not the snooty type who’ll show up in a pair of white gloves, commenting on the dust everywhere. Still, I always want to put our best foot forward whenever we have houseguests. But I can honestly say that she has never seen my house in the state she’s going to see it in now.

Several friends have told me that what I need for this season is a wife of my own, meaning that I need another woman around to do all the things I can’t do at the moment. I’ve also had several friends say for me to let them know if I need anything. Maybe it’s pride, or knowing that they’re all busy, but I can’t ask someone to take precious hours out of their day to come clean for me. I just can’t.

I know this is all temporary. In a few short months, someone will dig me out of the clutter to go to the hospital and have this baby, and after I’ve healed I’ll get back on top of things. Who knows? I might even find that box of hair dye before Christmas.

You know it’s a slow 4th of July if I’m taking the time to blog about a few recent frugal finds, but hey…it is what it is. (More on that in tomorrow’s column.)

I love to save a few dollars when I can, but am on a tight budget so I’m often reluctant to spend our hard-earned cash on something that might not work. Unlike some people, I’m not overly brand-loyal, except on a few items. Until now, two of those were Tide laundry detergent and Almay waterproof mascara.

I just wasn’t in the mood to drop $10 on another tube of Almay the other day, so I started scouring the makeup aisles at Target to see what else I could find. When I saw this Rimmel of London 100% Waterproof Mascara for the bargain, non-clearance price of $2.24, I decided it was worth a try. I used it for the first time this morning and was MUY impressed.

You must understand that my eyelashes are virtually non-existent. I was dealt a horribly puny hand in the eyelash department, and besides the fact that they are short, thin and skimpy, they are also a lighter brown than the hair on my head. You’d think someone with naturally almost-black hair would have dark, visible eyelashes, but not me.  My eyes are a dark grayish blue, so without makeup, I quite resemble a beady-eyed rat staring at you, my eyes just two dime-sized dots lost in a wide, pale face. So good mascara is a must.

This Rimmel of London fit the bill. I had better coverage in fewer coats, gave me longer lashes and overall better results than the Almay that costs 4 times as much.

And when I was thinking about sharing that with y’all, I also thought it worth mentioning that my Tide addiction has been broken by Purex Laundry Detergent . I’d have never ventured to try it it if weren’t for this baby I’m carrying. We plan to cloth diaper the little guy (another frugal choice) and when I saw Purex Free & Clear recommended on many cloth diapering websites, I figured I should try it on the family’s laundry and see what I thought before I’m faced with cleaning a mountain of soiled diapers.

Again, I couldn’t be more impressed. Today I am wearing a white cotton shirt that I spilled yellow mustard on, then forgot to pre-treat before putting in the hamper. It finally got washed this morning and the stains are gone. It comes in yummy fragrances, like Linen and Lilies, Apple and Melon, Lilac and White Lavender. And it costs at least half what Tide goes for—and you can often find coupons, too.

So, it’s not the most interesting blog I’ve ever written, but if I can help others save a buck in this tight economy, I’m happy to share. Feel free to reply with any of your recent frugal favorites! Thanks!